April 2011
I understand that you’re leaving and you think that by pushing me away it will make things easier, for both of our feelings sakes, but when you keep saying how you want everyone to hangout with you as much as they can while they still can, it’s really fucking contradicting. Cause regardless of our feelings for each other, I want to spend as much time with you as possible, because who knows, when you’re out of jail and back around, things might be completely different. So pardon me for getting pissed when you don’t invite me around anymore, and when I do come to your parties you act like i’m not there. This is a hard situation for both of us, but please don’t make me lose you before I it absolutely has to happen. Especially when you say things like “don’t get mad at me, because if you do then when I’m gone your gonna have to find out on your own how to write me.” and blahblahblah. So you want to not talk to me the entire month before you go to jail, but then you still want me to write you and visit you the whole time you’re gone? shit doesn’t work that way I’m sorry.
I’m looking for the upsides to these panic-attack nights.
Where I’m staying in eating take-out food by TV light.
I’m trying to play the b-side to this awkward life of mine.
You could flip me over, I’d sing a few lines about how,
I’m so used to shooting myself in the kneecaps,
standing in the way of progress or letting down my friends.
my night with a beer and horton hears a who. sounds like a decent way to make the best out of the shit I’m handed.
Stick To Your Guns - Some Kind of Hope
Broke my phone, broke my car, lost my bestfriend, &then there’s you, you, and you.
I’m just falling apart at the seems, and there’s no one left to put me back together.
You’re stupid, tonight was stupid, last night was stupid, everythings just stupid.
and I just don’t understand why I’m letting you.
I just sat outside in my bra with my hair wet and smoked a cigarette. hahahah \m/
T-minues 5 minutes til I get my answer.
I’ve been pretty great actually :) How about yourself!
Will I be seeing you at Four Year Strong on Wednesday, love? :)